Duality

Those who know me best often describe me as a series of internal contradictions.  I am in a constant state of cognitive dissonance, never being satisfied with any one choice or solution.  Here are some examples.

I am both an introvert and an extrovert.
I need to be around people, yet always need to be alone.
I am a fairly disorganized and messy person, but hate messiness and disorganization.
I am both vain and filled with self-loathing.
I view myself as both superior and inferior to others.
I am filled with constant discontent, yet would describe myself as happy.
I have a very unhealthy diet, yet am quite health-conscious.
I am constantly self-absorbed, yet other people matter to me more than anything else.
I am creative, yet logical.
I always want to be in a dating relationship, yet yearn for singleness while involved with a woman.
I am confident and self-reliant, yet insecure and dependent upon others.

Many of these contradictions likely resolve to singular explanations that I simply have not take the time to investigate.  Many other people likely share these same dualities.  I write this only to point out that a new duality has recently been creeping into my mind:

I believe both that the Earth is young and that it is old.

I can't explain exactly how I feel on the subject.  If you ask me how old the Earth is, I would give you a different answer depending on the day.  It seems so overwhelmingly clear to me based on the evidence that the earth cannot be as young as the Bible claims.  Yet somehow, this is the position I stand by.  If I had to sign a contract asking me how old I actually believe the Earth is, I would go with the biblical definition.  Both explanations seem right, yet they are certainly at odds.  The Earth cannot be billions of years old and have been created only a few thousand years ago.  Unlike my other dualities, this contradiction feels strangely comfortable.  Irony comes in the knowledge that this is the only duality listed here which is irreconcilable.

As a nation, I don't see how we can adopt anything but a scientific explanation of what we see.  Yet in my own life, isn't the truth of the Gospel the idea that matters most and is to be upheld at all costs?